a queer chaplain
Helping to lace one’s narrative with a spiritual thread.
Big shout out and Thank you to our monthly supporters. With your support we can continue to bring and upgrade Splintered Grace Podcast quality and reach.
To learn more or to join our Patreon go to patreon.com/bonnieviolet
a queer chaplain
Helping to lace one’s n
Engage! Rate, Follow, Subscribe & Share
Book ME! - Keynote, Panel, Guest on Show, Officiate Wedding /Memorial in/out of drag.
Collaborate! - Join Team, Guest, Make a Pitch
Sponsor! Patreon, Venmo, PayPal
a queer chaplain
Helping to lace one’s narrative with a spiritual thread.
Big shout out and Thank you to our monthly supporters. With your support we can continue to bring and upgrade Splintered Grace Podcast quality and reach.
To learn more or to join our Patreon go to patreon.com/bonnieviolet
a queer chaplain
Helping to lace one’s n
Engage! Rate, Follow, Subscribe & Share
Book ME! - Keynote, Panel, Guest on Show, Officiate Wedding /Memorial in/out of drag.
Collaborate! - Join Team, Guest, Make a Pitch
Sponsor! Patreon, Venmo, PayPal
[Music]
0:12
[Music] between [Music]
0:28
me hey everybody i think i know what day it is it's monday
0:34
it's time for splinter grace thank you for joining us i am tina frank a conservative christian
0:39
woman um that also is a believer in miracles hi everyone i'm bonnie violet um a
0:48
transgender drag queen artist chaplain person
0:56
struggling with my words well it's your turn last week guys yeah it's your turn this week to
1:03
struggle with the words at least i know what day of the week it is right it's tuesday right
1:10
don't get me started so hey how was your weekend uh
1:17
the weekend was good um i feel like like i life is so full it feels like so
1:24
much happens from day to day and yeah um like filming uh filming like a
1:29
music video with some other drag friends for a fundraiser you and i were on a
1:34
radio show yes we were i thought that went pretty well what did you think
1:40
yeah but i i really enjoyed that bob was a great host um it was an opportunity a great
1:45
opportunity i think for us to really just kind of share a little more details about the restoration process that we've
1:51
been through yeah for sure and uh for folks who are curious we'll put the links to that
1:56
interview um probably in this description i think i can get you a link
2:02
also there's a good chance we'll probably upload it um on the podcast as well um so as like maybe a bonus episode
2:10
um for this season i don't know that just kind of came to mind that sounds like a plan to me maybe we
2:16
could do that yeah i was uh you know it's like yeah like it's like with so many things you and i were
2:22
talking a little bit about this how we both can kind of get so uh uh
2:28
self-conscious when we're doing things and then kind of like critical about them and so like um i was feeling
2:35
the same way went through the interview and there was a part of me was like oh i didn't get to say this or did we say that or did we like you know and then i was able
2:42
to listen back to it i was like oh we didn't do you know we didn't do too bad we did pretty good
2:48
yeah that's awesome i can't wait to hear back i'm gonna listen back today so tell us a little more about the video
2:53
you're shooting did you say it was for a non-profit yeah um it was for like the recovery community um i did
2:59
a number with sutro towers uh linda summers and elia little that's
3:05
their their names and that's awesome yeah we did we did a salt and pepper number salt and pepper
3:12
number uh because it's a 90s themed show so that was cool should we have you give us a little
3:17
demonstration no no i signed an agreement that said i
3:24
couldn't oh okay okay that's a little bit of a lie
3:29
it's not a little bit of a lie it's a total lie well you have to make sure you share it
3:35
when it comes out on here so that everyone can see yeah i'll definitely get it out there once we once it's all done
3:41
were you guys in and did you guys have similar costumes you guys just got to be artists in
3:47
motion what that look like we all were kind of in like sequined gowns
3:52
and like like super sparkly it felt like a prom or a concealer something you know always looking for a
4:00
good opportunity to get dressed up yeah and to do it like in public you know we're like in the middle of an
4:06
intersection like doing kind of like voguing and fashion
4:12
so fun see i don't have enough courage to do that i think if you i had a hard enough time
4:18
when we needed pictures just doing that kind of stuff in my front room as you could tell because some of the pictures you got i know you
4:24
were like oh please so i don't know how you you have the courage to do that
4:29
in the middle of an intersection so something i hope to achieve as i understand a little bit
4:35
more yeah be more than a conqueror because some days i don't feel that at all
4:41
right i hear that a lot of the times it's like being if i can be out of my head i'm doing just fine but once i start
4:48
thinking oh my god do i look the then then i lose it and i'll tell the
4:53
way you think about that why is it that our first thought is to go to a negative i was thinking about that the other day
4:58
i i i first thought a lot of times not every time but a lot of times is about myself or even about other
5:05
people it's usually a negative i i'm like in
5:15
[Music] kind of lost our connection there for a
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second i think
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i'm not sure if it's on not too bad we've actually went like
5:32
almost all season without having any of these these glitches i'm directly connected to the ethernet so i
5:39
don't believe it's on my end um
5:47
hold please
6:00
she seems frozen frozen oh lost her well i'm sure she'll be back
6:07
in a second um
6:13
how are folks out there let's see all right
6:20
i don't know i don't know what to do when she's not here i don't know how to i don't know what to talk about i don't know what to say
6:26
as we volley off one another um today though we were um we we didn't necessarily have a have a
6:33
topic today as well either so if you all have a question or something you would like for
6:38
to hear us talk about that would be really great um you could just put it in the comments um
6:43
we uh yeah it looks like i just got a message that the connection is good so at least on my
6:51
side so hopefully tina will be able to pop in here in a second but if you have questions or comments or
6:57
something you'd love for us to talk about um please do um put it in the comments
7:02
um because we could really use it today we never have a hard time uh chatting
7:08
but um if you have something to that we can riff off of that would be
7:13
really rad um well it's one of the things i wanted i
7:20
can just do some of the the logistical stuff while we're waiting for her to pop back on um i wanted to give a shout out and a
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thank you to violet violet is a new um
7:34
patreon who joined us yesterday who um signed up basically to contribute to the
7:40
work of a queer chaplain and a splintered grace um so if it's something that you're
7:46
interested um you can check that out as well i don't do well with this
7:52
oh oh oh yay there she is sorry about that um
7:58
something happened with my internet it's interesting because the internet truck is out front of my house at my
8:04
neighbor's house so i'm wondering they're like that had something to do
8:09
yeah so sorry about that it's monday so i guess one of those quirky things of
8:15
doing a live broadcast huh yeah i learned that i'm horrible at stalling
8:20
and and like not having you here
8:26
so anyway i kept talking because i wasn't sure what was happening until my computer went like blue i'm like oh the blue screen of
8:32
death is never good right well and i kind of think where are you like when you
8:37
what you were talking about when you froze do you recall um i think we were talking about your
8:43
video and um i don't know i kept talking so i don't know where i felt right well how was your weekend
8:53
well well i don't know what was the last thing you heard i don't i don't think i heard anything okay
8:59
yeah so funny anyway i i had a great weekend um easter
9:06
was this weekend and and for me it was just like one of my favorite times we were so
9:11
uh blessed that we were able to get together as a church a church community rather than online
9:17
and to me that was just incredible we've been able to do that for the last few weeks but for easter
9:22
sunday was really a blessing because for me um last easter
9:28
all my easter plants got blown out of the water because of kovan i think everybody did it yeah it was a
9:34
yeah it was the first first time first time ever that we hadn't gotten together at church
9:40
and family for a very long time so it was really awesome this year to be able to do that and you know we had a great great
9:48
teaching some of my family got to go to church with me which is always a bonus and then
9:55
after after church we all came back here and we just had a great time hanging out i was telling you earlier that my whole
10:01
backyard looks like confetti it's all over the place it was so fun we um
10:07
hopefully i'm not taking too long but we we decided to make it real easy we did tacos and paper plates and that
10:14
we all come armed with water balloons oh my gosh we had so much fun we had like 600 water balloons
10:21
and every one of them popped and they're all over my backyard so it's very fun that was always a fun
10:28
tradition growing up it's like especially like around fourth of july or i feel like that was the big day but
10:34
there were times when we would get in huge water fights and it would be like two or three house you know it's like the whole block down
10:43
water balloons and like yeah it was intense it was it was a lot of fun it was a lot of fun yeah we didn't allow
10:49
hoses but oh my goodness but all everyone participate all the adults all the kids it was it was a free for all we just had
10:56
a great friend that's great what well your way i
11:02
um uh i asked for folks to um ask us questions or bring up some
11:07
topics so um david um sent us a question so
11:13
we'll read it here david wants to hear your thoughts on god and guns
11:19
uh why are they always bunched together by many conservatives
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well i don't know that that god has any any specifics about guns i think that a
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lot of christians or conservative christians believed in the constant on the
11:37
constitution and the bill of rights and the right to bear arms so i think it just kind of goes
11:44
um just follows along those lines i've never heard my pastor or a pastor ever say we should
11:50
all be carrying guns i've never heard that i think these are just people wanting to
11:56
exercise their right or feeling um that they want to be able to protect themselves and
12:02
i will say i go both ways although we do have firearms in our home i don't
12:08
carry a firearm personally i do know how to shoot a firearm so i could protect myself if i
12:14
needed to um but i have a lot of thoughts about that myself
12:19
you know the bible says that um the battle is not ours it's it's god's and um
12:26
i believe that literally in the physical as well as the spiritual um but i understand people wants to
12:34
exercise their right to bear arms i don't think they should be taken away from people i don't think they should be
12:40
[Music] i know there should be some regulations but but i think that people are
12:46
able to make some of their own choices so i have i have a lot of different
12:51
thoughts on that so i don't want to start a whole another conversation about all that but i'm happy to answer any questions that
12:56
you have based on my own my own ideas my own thoughts and my own beliefs i'm not speaking for anybody
13:03
else yeah i think i don't i think that um
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yeah i don't know i feel like a lot of folks aren't necessarily i mean completely anti-gun i think it's just
13:14
the idea of like um there's certain guns like do we need machine guns do we need like
13:20
even handguns i mean i don't i don't i don't know those are the things for me like that i just don't
13:26
but i'm like i don't know i don't like guns um i didn't even like them for hunting
13:32
like i understand doing it for hunting and for food like those are things that we lived up lived on growing up and was
13:39
very aware of but i just don't know if it's i think it's yeah i don't know i just don't i don't
13:45
like how there's all these shootings happening and people are getting shot up in the ways that they are i don't know that just removing guns is
13:52
going to fix that but i think it i think it could probably
13:57
i don't know i don't think it would hurt you know yeah yeah guns are
14:04
a big conversation and i don't think god and guns are definite necessarily meant to go together but i
14:10
think people that um ever that i know of that are conservative that are in the church a lot of them do carry
14:17
a gun and i think that some there's one more thought real quick i think that um
14:22
because of some of the guns the shootings that have happened inside the churches for different reasons
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i think i think people feel like they need to have one available if something like that happened so i think that's been another um
14:35
motivator for all that yeah well and i wonder if like the gods and gun to me
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when i think of like conservative and i don't know like i think of like kind of older tradition and kind of like holding
14:47
on to the way things were at one point in time and there maybe was a time when the world wasn't the way that it was and
14:55
there weren't guns and there weren't you know there wasn't i don't know it's like it's a different time so maybe some adjustments
15:01
could be made but david has a follow-up um david says i grew up with guns too and
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actually enjoyed firing them firing them both as a teen and
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as and in the military now i am struggling with it i would like to have one for protection
15:18
in my home but i also have four-year-old twins and i am scared of keeping them in the
15:24
home and david asked do you have guns in your home or did you have guns in your home while
15:30
raising kids uh yes i do our guns are locked and safe
15:38
we did not take our kids out and teach them about firearms we just had one for protection as my
15:45
kids have grown up and become adults they have chosen not all of them but some of them have chosen to also have a
15:52
firearm in their home and we have encouraged and and helped them to teach our
15:57
grandchildren about them and that they also have them locked up in safes at home and unloaded
16:03
uh so that we feel like that's a that's a safer way to go but you're
16:09
going to hear arguments contrary to that well if it's locked up and unloaded how can you defend yourself
16:15
and i think there's a viable argument if someone was to enter my house but i think that's where my faith has to
16:21
cover me so there's there's a fine line there so yes i did
16:26
i was single for most of the time my kids were little so i did not have a gun when i got married the man i married
16:34
did have a gun and we kept it locked up and at that time we did not uh teach our
16:39
kids so now they're learning that as adults and making those decisions for themselves
16:44
gotcha yeah and so like it is a handgun considered the gun for protection or
16:52
you know we have we both my husband i both have a handgun now that we are comfortable with and we could use to
16:58
defend ourselves again i don't carry mine all the time we also do have um he had a rifle when i
17:07
married him and then he inherited an older gun that's more of a just a novelty
17:14
that we have um and i i can't remember if he's got another one that he has gotten over the years for hunting or not
17:20
but that's all that's it we don't have a whole entourage of guns but they are all they're all locked in a
17:26
safe um and not in a safe that's just everyone can see it and admire it or we don't not
17:31
that kind of a safe it's a safe but they'd have to know where it is um how to access it and and pull any of
17:37
those things out yeah i feel i mean i grew up i think the only guns
17:43
that i really grew up around mostly were just more around like hunting guns or shooting you know like rifles
17:49
shotguns yeah and i never had a um
17:54
i never had a um a like a desire like i just never had i i
18:00
didn't like guns i was scared of guns i remember having an opportunity where when i was
18:06
younger i was with my i was with my father and he shot a guy i shot a
18:13
deer and i remember like me i was really excited about it for some reason so i was like really excited
18:19
and i went running up to the hill and then i got to the deer and the deer was dying and i was and i
18:26
ran down the hill crying it screamed me they were heartbroken yeah yeah so i think after that i just i just
18:32
did not i did not like i just don't like guns i i feel really uncomfortable with them um sorry just kind of like personally i
18:39
just don't like being around them but i've i guess i totally get it yeah when your ex-husband uh lived with
18:46
me for a little while he had a handgun and i was like really uncomfortable with that just it's just my like normal what i'm what i'm
18:53
used to you know right right and i think he still has a few guns laying around
18:59
i'm assuming he he is responsible with them as well
19:04
yeah i i think a part of me just and i i mean i i think at the end of the day it does have to do with like i think at the end
19:11
of the day it's not a gun a gun itself that that um that you know like
19:17
it's the it's the person behind the guy the operator yeah that can can cause the violence and um
19:24
i do think though that the the um like i feel like it's a communal
19:31
response because of the way the society is existing it is creating
19:36
these um creating it within some of us i think to
19:44
use guns in a violent way or to feel like we need to have them or you know what i mean and so like
19:49
i feel like the solution isn't necessarily it might not necessarily be about
19:54
getting rid of the guns but working with the people but also
20:00
you have to keep the guns away if you will until the person's well do you know what
20:05
i mean like until we until we can get better i think kind of like the way that we put guns in a safe
20:11
when we're around kids you know like when we're raising kids is because they don't they're not at a space that
20:18
they can handle that well right right and so that's why like maybe
20:23
regulations and things like that might make a little sense and maybe even a little bit more than normal because we're dealing with
20:29
like mass shootings in a way that we've never dealt with before ahead sorry not not to sound old and and
20:36
uh too crazy conservative but there are some thoughts on that you know i am
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from a generation a little bit older and we used to not see um
20:48
all of the violent entertainment that is available now you know when we when we shot a gun
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it was shot for a purpose and it was shot to kill you know be it an animal or a
21:02
defended thing and and now i see my grandkids sitting in front of video games for
21:08
hours at a time shooting shooting i know they're fake people i know they're fake whatever but i feel
21:13
like there's a desensition sensitized to some of that you know i mean because i
21:18
i don't know what the game is because i don't do video games so please forgive me but i saw and i was so mortified that
21:25
they are even allowing him to play that although he's 13. right but they shoot this
21:32
person on the video screen i know they're not real but the whole way the the shot
21:39
um landed it was real it looked just like if you would have shot a person wow you know there was like the
21:46
blood there was the whatever there was a response in the movement of the body as it felt i'm like oh my gosh and this
21:52
is okay now i'm gonna shoot five more because we're doing this quest and so i feel like this is just my opinion
21:58
i feel like along with the uh responsibility and all that stuff of guns i feel like there's a
22:05
responsibility to i don't know maybe not even responsibilities right where there's we've kind of desensitized the
22:12
catastrophe does that make sense of someone losing a life because all lives
22:18
are are worth living and if we take someone's life for any other purpose and
22:23
to defend our own it's not okay in my opinion and and so it grieves my
22:30
heart when i see these kinds of and i'm not that oh they play the music backwards you're
22:36
going to hear satan i'm not that kind of a christian right and and i believe we need to live in culture and i
22:42
need to we need to experience culture so i i don't feel like i'm i'm like the crazy lunatic kind but i do think
22:48
that with the things that we're seeing as general entertainment is a little bit desensitizing and
22:55
creates some of these challenges or assists with that at least yeah i mean i
23:00
would think that video games might make a lot of sense but i also think that we live in a world where there is i where a lot of people
23:08
for whatever reason feel like they don't have much choice but to be a little bit more violent with
23:14
things you know and i think partially that you know has to do i mean there's so many people without
23:20
there are so many restrictions i don't know i just feel like there's i feel like people feel like they i
23:27
don't know i i'm i don't have a gun so i don't i don't know what the transformation is well i i i always think violence is a choice
23:35
i don't have to just be violent and i feel like it's created though it's created it's kind of like that idea
23:40
of hurt people hurt people um so it's i think it's created in us
23:47
um and if it's not tended to then it just builds and i feel like that's what's been more of an issue is there's
23:53
been this ongoing kind of um trauma in certain families
23:59
and communities that are just stuck in that cycle and there's not a environment and
24:06
a society and a community that really can help folks heal and come out of that you know
24:14
i think that's what the church's job is right but but i think that's like the thing is so how do you do that you have to invest
24:22
in those communities you have to put the money the focus the you know and that's a lot of what
24:27
the conversation is when people say like say like you know that we need to abolish the police
24:34
what they're saying is we need to focus on on addressing the symptoms the things that
24:39
lead to the things in this way versus like just cleaning up the mess
24:44
if you will i agree i think there's a need for both though i think there needs to be yeah
24:51
it is a process like it's like because we can't just go from like boom to boom tomorrow um but because
24:59
there's it's not like everything's just going to switch like that so sorry that's all good david has another
25:05
comment he says it sounds like we are all on the same page about gun safety and users
25:11
but should we restrict the type of gun like automatic weapons so those with mental health issues
25:17
cannot fire hundreds of rounds in seconds i have to say i don't i haven't really
25:27
i i don't i personally don't see a need for all that stuff but i do know there's um and i want to go back
25:34
sporting things that people do with those types of guns you know i've seen uh rifle competitions and different
25:41
types of things like that that i think people engage in that as a as an activity i don't know how to
25:47
restrict all that so i and again i'm not a
25:52
i'm not big on restriction unless there's a a really good reason now i'm hoping that
26:00
they'll continue with background checks and some of these other things that they're doing i'm all about higher regulation on certain types of
26:08
weapons i think that's necessary you know someone like me i certainly don't need some machine gun that shoots however
26:14
many bullets and i think guns are created to kill people yeah yeah like yeah that's the purpose yeah
26:22
that's not even good for so so yeah but yeah so you know i don't i take each i look at
26:28
these regulations very seriously and those things when they come to a vote i'm one of the people that is nerdy
26:35
enough that i read all of that stuff i ask questions i
26:40
under try to understand and i do uh make my voice known to my representatives
26:46
um because that's very important to me i don't want crazy weapons in and and qualified hands
26:52
and you're yeah so h for me it's each different i i don't see a reason for a
26:58
machine gun or some of those automatic weapons at all but to to take a hard stand i'd have to
27:05
have some more information and understand all the working parts yeah and i think i mean i think
27:10
ultimately a lot of us are like like i'm like i want people to be able to you know make choices in their own life
27:17
and determine what what's good for them and what's not you know obviously there are um maybe short-sightedness
27:26
that we can have that we could be causing harm that you know what i mean like like so i i agree with the idea yeah i i
27:33
struggle with just saying no no to that because i think it's very real too like we still live in a world
27:39
in which there's guns our government has guns our police have guns um our enemies of war
27:47
have guns so the so i think completely yeah like it's not for me um but i guess
27:54
i could understand why maybe people have have them i just personally i just don't see the use
28:01
i just don't have any purpose in them but we also still live in a world that's still hurting so these and i think people keeping
28:09
those personal freedoms available is important yeah and and for me that's what it goes back to
28:15
is my my personal freedoms of of living the life that i you know if i'm a free country i want to experience
28:22
those freedoms and as long as my freedoms aren't um stealing from somebody else right or
28:28
hurting somebody else yeah so good questions david thank you
28:34
so much for for engaging hopefully we answered your questions and didn't go off on a side note like
28:40
you know we do i don't think i've ever really talked about guns um so you know what i mean i don't feel
28:47
like i'm first and in talking about it you know yeah it's not a conversation i engage in much
28:54
either i i do i do think about that though is when things come up and when we've got
28:59
elections coming on and all that stuff that is a it's not my most important
29:04
issue that i would chase after but it's definitely uh down the line something that i consider when i'm when i'm
29:09
casting a vote yeah yeah so yeah i guess that makes me conservative
29:16
well like there's you know like i don't know i just don't think about it as much and maybe that's my own like
29:22
i don't know naivete or whatever but i just don't you know what i mean i don't know yeah i
29:28
don't know david says um you did very insightful on a difficult topic
29:33
thank you oh thank you for timing david yeah and david david is our
29:40
mutual friend's brother marcus's friend david hey nice to meet you we love marcus
29:50
yes um oh yeah i don't know so did you get to
29:56
attend church even online on sunday um i did i do church yesterday like i
30:03
said it feels like so long i said do you even know what day of the week it is no i did go to a little bit of a service
30:09
in the morning um my the service in milwaukee that i like to go to um but i do i do my lives now
30:17
on sunday mornings too and i just i just didn't get a chance to um to do it yesterday with doing the the
30:25
movie and all or doing the video and all that so i'll probably get a chance to watch
30:31
something you know after do they not i love and hate all that
30:39
love and hate all the the online possibilities i mean i so love the
30:45
ability that if i need to i can log on and not miss church
30:51
that it makes me sad that i can't get to to not get to i don't want to become that person that i don't desire to get
30:56
together with some with the church or any group like that
31:01
that i'd prefer to have an online interaction because online interactions are great for supplemental but for regular uh
31:10
activity i i don't think it's it's um i just don't think it's good for us because we're relational people but
31:16
it's so i think that's a good thing that's come out of cobit as far as people having to be creative and being
31:23
able to reach out digitally even myself i've expanded my borders and all of that
31:28
um so i'm grateful like you i can go to church on monday if something's not happening on sunday
31:34
or wednesday or whatever the day is um but yeah that's awesome i can't wait till the day you can walk into a church
31:42
and actually embrace somebody and engage with somebody yeah me too i mean and the accessibility
31:49
is it's different right like so for some for some of us we have more accessibility
31:55
in a time that we're not supposed to be with one another because we have internet because we have a home because we have
32:00
these sorts of things and there are plenty of other people that are kind of now without because
32:06
they maybe have those sorts of ways of connecting anyway and then now they don't have like the buildings or the the groups of
32:12
people to kind of connect with too so i think it you know for some folks it just maybe made things even more
32:19
unexcessive inaccessible well see i had i hadn't thought about that so it just kind of kind of depends but
32:26
things sure have changed in the last year yeah i think it's just going to create a world in which well and there was a
32:31
virtual world i mean there's a virtual world that a lot of people lived in i just don't think it had become
32:37
as mainstream as it is and i i hope that as things open up they kind of are able to have that
32:44
virtual option for folks who do need it because some of the things that is nice is i
32:50
think folks who are from smaller towns or rural areas or haven't been out of wherever they are
32:57
they can have an opportunity to kind of venture into other communities in other space and kind of be introduced to
33:04
um just difference um that could be helpful so i think that's been really good i've enjoyed that aspect a lot
33:11
myself too yeah me too me too you know what another thing i've enjoyed is a curbside pickup at restaurants
33:18
yeah i know that sounds bad but i'm thinking hmm i'm not sure i mean i i i we're in a
33:25
small town here where i'm at and although we don't have all the chain restaurants so all of ours are mom and
33:30
pop so when they did all those shortening down and only x amount x amount so we all made a commitment to
33:37
purchase a meal from a restaurant you know once a week or once every couple weeks so that they can kind of
33:42
keep their doors open and i have to say there are some places that i frequented inside the restaurant that i might just
33:49
continue to pick up my food because the food was good i love eating it in my house
33:55
and who'd have thought i still didn't have to cook so that's nice the cleanup's still easy i can toss it in the trash
34:01
but so i really kind of i mean i feel like that whole evolved i mean i've got so many options
34:06
now that i never had before you know before if i wanted to have takeout or whatever i had to have a
34:12
pizza pretty much but now i can just have whatever i want which is nice
34:17
yeah that is make it nice i'm eager to have the opportunity to be like more i'm
34:24
a more tangible person um like i like i don't know i just like i guess i want
34:30
to say like three-dimensional things i glass i don't know it's so weird because i also
34:36
because i always said i was feeling like i've lost my ability to be affectionate
34:43
as i've gotten older for whatever reason like i'm not a tiny feely person like i used to be or
34:48
whatever and um when we when that was actually removed
34:54
from our life for a while i actually really then i i saw actually how much affection i did
35:00
have in my life um because i hadn't um i just felt i i
35:05
just remember feeling more like i was at a deficit of affection in my life and kind of desiring more of it
35:12
and then once it kind of was removed from me then i was like well hey i i do have some affection
35:19
for the affection that i've had and then you know so i'm hoping that that's something that i'll continue to kind of like
35:25
not take for granted um in the you know in the future so that's that's
35:31
interesting you know the the things that change can help us to realize about ourselves
35:37
to me is continually amazing yeah without change i think we just kind
35:42
of exist in a space so we may be a comfortable space but if we're not constantly changing and
35:49
challenging our perspective who we are what's important to us
35:55
i mean we will never see areas in our life that might not be where it's where it should be you know and even as
36:01
little as what we're talking about right i you know it's in some ways too it's like it's like why
36:08
did it take this to happen for things to change in the way that they're beginning to change
36:14
you know it's like but you know i know that's like i have to be in a lot of freaking pain
36:20
and there has to be no no other option alternatively
36:25
for me to actually change if i'm not like knocked down i think you're like a lot
36:32
of other people too i think you're right so yeah this this really gave us no other options
36:38
and so it's like we got to adjust you know that i was hearing i don't know if you're if you've been listening to the news or
36:44
if this is affecting you guys um our elementary schools or actually all our schools are being really
36:49
affected here because all this change and i believe change is always good even if it's
36:55
uncomfortable or whatever i think it's always good because something has to rise up from it right so
37:03
all these kids went to online and back in thing and then back online
37:08
and then back so they've been back and forth well now a lot of these students are choosing not
37:14
to go back to the classroom they're making that decision for themselves and i don't know if they're doing
37:20
homeschooling if they're doing online schooling through some of these bigger online high
37:25
schools that have been around for a while or whatever but i know one of our school districts here laid off 1500 people
37:32
oh wow yeah because the kids aren't coming back or yeah because there's not enough
37:38
enrollment so i'm thinking at first i'm like oh this is awful
37:44
and and i'm i'm praying that um these folks that have been laid off will find another solution i mean it's a change for them
37:50
so what it's a a a rolling change so it got affected by
37:55
the the kovid um if they went up and down up and down up and down trying to find a solution
38:01
well now there's another devastating change in this sector and so now this change the parents made for themselves for
38:07
their family is affecting these other families now without income so it'll be interesting to see
38:13
how that changed so when i'm thinking about this i'm thinking oh my goodness our i feel like our our educational
38:19
system at least at a k through 12 maybe in the process of a change yeah i don't know what
38:26
that's gonna look like have you heard anything like that um over in san francisco um i haven't heard much of that
38:32
my i know like some of the teachers are going back to school this week to get ready for the
38:39
kids to come um but i at least like my um one of my mentors is a school teacher
38:45
and so that's her story she's like getting to go back into the classroom this weekend is this their first time back in the
38:51
classroom yeah oh wow it's been uh virtual the whole time wow
38:56
like i guess probably about a year now or so um yeah but you know the education system
39:02
you know could probably use an overhaul as well you know for sure there's been like a lack of
39:07
investment i think and then you know i mean the education system in a lot of ways the way that it was
39:12
created was to you know to create people to get into jobs like to like it was very much about how do we
39:20
get people to work in these like you know get these jobs to do our
39:25
our the work we want them to do so we can make lots of money that was part of i think the intention
39:30
and then also um as kind of like babysitting you know like
39:36
a way of taking care of the kids so that you know folks can go to work yeah yeah so yeah so i i agree with you
39:43
there there has needed to be a change um for a long time but they could so it's going to be interesting to see
39:50
a lot of things i think we could be more efficient with our time you know um you know like i don't
39:56
understand why we have to work 40 hours a week i know in most of the jobs that i did the bulk of the actual work that i did
40:03
was probably done in like 20 hours of that week or you know the rest was all that in between crap that's
40:08
just taking up space it's like i think i think we could be more efficient
40:14
um we could be we could have more people with jobs we could be more efficient and we would
40:20
be happier because we would have time to be doing the other things outside of work because
40:26
our life is so around work and i think school can be the same way for kids um it you know until they get into their
40:33
adulthood and i know like in wendell they started cutting down they went from a five day school to four
40:42
day i think a couple years ago basically to save money yeah at least that was my setting yeah i
40:49
think you're right yeah so it's to be it's going to be interesting i think there's a lot of things that have been
40:54
misdirected and misguided over the years that may be getting a second look and then you know again i think change
41:02
is always good and we get we get in a in our sweet spot there we just want to stay there forever
41:08
but if we stay there forever we're missing out what that next growth is you know i would love to see everybody
41:14
working on working in an area that they're passionate about you know it breaks my heart to hear
41:19
people saying oh i've been doing this for 20 years this job for 20 years they hate it but they're going to keep doing
41:25
it because because they need to make money my personal belief is that if we can
41:30
find that thing that we're passionate about even though that that passionate thing may change as we go
41:36
through different seasons in life i think we can we can not only be creative but we can find our income
41:41
stream and we can find that space where we can be the best of who we're created to be and so
41:50
yeah i think there's a lot of things that we have to do to change that though so that yeah so that everyone could work in their
41:55
passion i mean there's a lot of folks that are just stuck working where they're working because they they really
42:02
don't have any choice they didn't have access to the education they didn't have access to maybe move somewhere else they
42:07
have whatever sort of histories or uh discriminations or biases or
42:13
whatever that's you know they're going up against that keeps them in certain um ways of being um and i think until we
42:20
can really address those things um people are going to kind of be stuck and tell you you go you'll get those folks that you know
42:26
somehow bust through it um but you know a lot of folks kind of get kind of get stuck where they're at
42:33
i think i think there's a lot of that feeling that i am stuck where i'm at and there's nothing i can do to get out of
42:38
this situation and i think that's that could be true for a lot of for a lot of folks people
42:46
well how do you think that that needs to be addressed well you know
42:53
it's it's a huge thing but i don't think that um and this might sound like and i don't underst like i'm not
42:59
like a big politician speaking person but i don't think that my understanding
43:04
of capitalism i don't think is really helpful like i don't think there are people who
43:10
have more money than they need uh like anybody needs and then there are more
43:16
and more people starving and going without and you know what i mean like the poverty level like
43:22
it's just getting more and more and it's like i think that there's a way that i don't think we should i don't think
43:28
somebody who gets paid works at the restaurant if you will i don't know i
43:34
just feel like the the way the amount that we pay people how money is distributed is not done
43:39
equally it's not done fairly if we all have value and worth
43:44
why do we have to um have all these i don't know i just feel like there's we give certain money to certain people
43:51
in some situations and others we don't and they're still doing 40 hours of work that is meaningful it matters to
43:58
the community in one way or the other whether they're driving a bus or they're
44:04
they're working in the parks or they're a doctor at a hospital or they're a
44:09
preacher or they're you know what i mean i just feel like there's a lot of greedy people
44:14
so you think that that should change via government or what do you what do you think drives
44:20
that change well the probably
44:26
well just because because the government is so so much i'm not trying to laugh
44:32
i'm just thinking i'm not sure there's a right answer i know i'm just like i'm like i didn't just say that just to tie you up by
44:39
saying that's really not an answer to them yeah well because we got i mean the the reality is if like
44:46
i guess it has to be with the government but it also has to kind of be with the people too you know that has to change because it has to be
44:54
you know it ha like i don't know because yeah it just has to be both because you can't go if you're ready the
45:01
government we all have to participate the government still kind of has too much control are you conservative
45:09
no i don't think that that's i don't think that that's a conservative i think that's where conservatives and progressives
45:15
don't communicate well i don't think that i don't think that most progressives are
45:20
like therefore people having better experience and more experience and more options and more agency to be
45:27
able to make your own decisions about your own life and um as long as it's not harming others i think that we all
45:34
we all want that i think we all just have different ways of of how that's going to happen
45:41
yeah i think that right i mean if you listen to it i don't think most even like they're
45:46
like more government i think folks are just trying to work within a system of power to change it to be useful
45:54
instead of harmful and we all have different ways of approaching that yeah
46:00
but what what is happening is not good you're right and and yeah well i'm sure
46:07
we both have some ideas about all that i don't want to get us off on a side chart everybody going oh wow
46:13
i know right we need to no longer have two parties we need to have term limits on everybody
46:18
um i think being an elected official should become more of a civil
46:25
um like a duty like you would you go to jury i think that there should be so much options to be in government that it's
46:33
almost something that everybody does at some point in time in their life and i think that's important to allow
46:38
our country to continue to address the world in the now
46:44
not in the past you know like with what's the reality what's relevant what's important now and i think if if if we had term
46:52
limits if people weren't like career politicians you know if we have a constitution
46:58
and we have a system that we think works well then it should be able to run itself and
47:03
you just insert new people right and if we could just insert more new people i think we could start getting
47:09
better results um i agree because i think when people come in there
47:15
there's a passion level so i can't even tell you how many times i've been disappointed by a candidate
47:21
who is on fire they've got all these ideas they've got fresh ideas they got fresh understanding they bring a whole
47:26
level of different types of skill sets i'm so tired of the same skill sets between those same chairs with a
47:32
different name and they they get up there they get in there and then all of a sudden things shift
47:38
and people say well it's because they didn't know how this really works what do you mean we don't want it
47:44
working the same way it's been work and that's why we put that person in in in that spot so yeah i try not to get
47:49
disappointed with the individual because i have no idea what kind of pressure they have once they get in
47:55
there and if they're how those ideas are received or what kind of stuff goes on i have no idea
48:00
but i agree with you that if we were to have fresh individuals in there with term limits i i don't want any more
48:07
i don't want career politicians either yeah i think that's where new passion comes i
48:13
think we need to remove the money that's where the money needs to go away i think that's money issued issue well i think that if we can
48:22
get those limits and those things and i think well i'm with you i don't think i'm the only people the only way i'm
48:30
sorry get into office is money you have to have a lot of money in order to even like get into office
48:37
you're right and i think i think that's that's i think anyone who wants to run should be able to run and they should and they should have
48:44
equal press time as everybody else i don't think anyone should be able to buy an ad i
48:49
think they need to earn those ads the government should should pay for the campaigning
48:54
no but it needs to be more balanced where everyone
49:00
has that has an equal opportunity to really like yes so i i agree and and i think the
49:06
immediate responsibility is to interview all those candidates unbiased
49:12
and and have a real a real idea of who people are
49:17
i i want to see their real track record what are they what are they really doing so i don't yeah i i think we're on the
49:24
same page there we're going to go off too far right now oh we are we're fine we can get it all out
49:30
i think the thing the other thing i think we need to do i think everybody needs to have the uh right to vote yeah well
49:38
if they're live within the within the the region i think they should have i
49:43
think they should get to and i think i think um i think prisoners people in jail should
49:50
also be voting um i think anyone who's an american citizen should be able to vote
49:58
so wherever they're at i think they should be able to vote yeah i think if i think if you're living
50:04
in the area i think you should be able to vote okay well you just have a gray area there so just because i don't
50:10
it's like like a lot of things you don't have equal access to um we don't all have access to that same
50:17
sort of liberty or that same sort of uh i don't know credentialing if you will
50:23
so i think we have to really decide what who i guess if you're a resident of the
50:29
united states but maybe the definition of who a residence is who a resident
50:34
is could change yeah so i think there definitely needs to be a lot of work done in all this
50:40
david uh peter says amazing topics today that was earlier that
50:46
peter posted that he might not feel that way now but he did earlier and david says
50:53
including prisoners uh yes i do i know that's crazy but i do think that everyone should have
50:58
access even prisoners partially because i think that the what our prison system is
51:04
is is uh i want to use that f word it's not great i think we have
51:09
way too many people in prisons um for a lot of the wrong reasons
51:16
and we're not actually really correcting anything and we're not creating systems and structure we're basically just i think we do this
51:24
with a lot of things is we have a problem with something and we throw it away and i feel like we've done that with
51:30
people um and i feel like prisons are full of that and it's easy for our for
51:35
government or whoever just to throw these people over here and not think about it but do you know how we spend so much money on that we
51:41
invest so much in that and i think that it could be better and if we have so many people in prison
51:46
that their vote is like pushing some sort of like is swinging
51:52
the votes then i i think that there's something in that for us to learn
51:58
from as a country you know what i mean if that were ever the case that we had so many prisoners that they were
52:04
declaring who was president of the united states or who was governor of some place and i think that would probably be something we
52:10
really need to look at i think as a society
52:15
but i don't know well hey that's that's your perspective so you're
52:21
entitled to have that's why we live in the country that we live in we have that we can have whatever perspective we want yeah and we can work
52:27
towards change uh toward that perspective we just got to do it with dignity
52:32
and and with love and honesty you know i i just had my family over for easter
52:39
so blessed but when we sit in this room and we all had a great time playing and doing
52:44
whatever but we don't all agree with how things are religiously uh politically
52:52
what we all aren't the same so you're not seeing all of my family when you see me right
52:58
so for us to be able to get together and um enjoy one another
53:06
um and still have our differences and things i mean we we can stand on different sides of a political agenda
53:12
both completely differently and we can still come together as a family and love each other respect one another
53:18
support one another and i think those are things that we need to work on as communities not just families but as
53:25
families a good start because i think the family's broken in a lot of areas for that we've gone through our own brokenness and
53:31
restoration and all that stuff and you and i have gone through all that also um but i think if we can work
53:38
towards that as a as a nation and starting with our communities and i i think if we can both be active
53:45
in my community your community my family your family our family as a whole that's when i
53:51
think we see to start to see change and and if everyone could focus in on that the area that they have around them
53:57
and start there i think there's a rapid effect that can change and there's going to be lots of
54:03
different little things that come out of that you know prisons open prisons close please go and please not close
54:09
you know what i'm saying education no education schools no schools i think all that stuff
54:14
that we've been arguing about i think we'll start to self-correct if we can if we can just move in that
54:19
direction but i have to be honest i i don't i don't want someone trying to be the boss of me
54:26
i don't want someone trying to change my ideas and my opinions to be like theirs and to tell me that if they're not that
54:32
i'm wrong or i'm a or i'm an idiot um there just needs to be space for all of
54:39
us to live and to love one another to be honest even if we don't like the
54:46
honesty that the other person is sharing and so that's that's that's the desire
54:51
of my heart that's the space that i aspire to live personally and i'm hoping we'll find more of as i
54:58
continue to grow as an individual and and that those people will will also
55:03
grow around me so that we can continue to create a larger space um for people to just be who they are
55:10
yeah well i think that's the um you know that's i think that's moving beyond the duality of you know the reality is is
55:17
there's not just two sides of everything no that's all we hear about you're right we live in that in between in the
55:24
shade the shades of bright if we could live in that instead of this other thing because
55:30
that's who we're that's what we're being told this is the thing or this is the thing and it's a minority of people that maybe
55:36
even like think that thing is worth a and the rest of us are like all in the
55:41
middle i know we're running out of time and i um i don't i don't i haven't i don't edit yet i don't have the
55:47
i don't have the staff for the time for these right now um so we will
55:54
probably want to try to uh be done do you want to share your um
56:02
your mask oh i'm sorry i still forgot so one of the great things that happened to me this weekend was i got my
56:09
splintered grace mask in the mail so fun we saw an opportunity to get some of these made and so
56:16
if anyone is in the market for a new mask we we ask you consider oops i got mine
56:22
wonky here that's all right it's very comfortable it's it's a soft fabric
56:28
and you can let everyone know that you're a fan right yeah so we have masks we have
56:34
coffee cups and we have water bottles so i have the link in the bottom uh scrolling right now that you can
56:42
check it out at queerchaplain.creator.spring.com
56:47
which is a mess i but it's there write it down and i'll
56:52
also put it in the description so you can just click on it that'll be a lot easier um then it'll help support uh
56:59
the costs of just you know hosting this um this uh podcast every month every week and uh
57:08
the work of a queer chaplain so awesome and go ahead and uh plug good um bob
57:16
also yeah yeah well and uh so bob kaiser has a series on forgiveness with
57:21
wghc out of uh northern chicago and so we
57:26
um uh we'll put a link also in the bottom to his show um that's he has three i think we're in
57:33
in his third episode of the series um so um you can check that out as well as just it's a really great um
57:39
series and he's had some really great folks on yeah some great conversations talking also on wednesday i'm in i'm
57:45
interviewing flamie grant um which i'm excited about that so anyway hi um reverse art
57:53
glad you could pop in and say hello um we are on our way out so we are going to say goodbye
58:01
and you want to say goodbye tina yep everyone have a fabulous week thanks for joining us today i look forward to next
58:06
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